How to Survive the Downs

Jacob Lund/Shutterstock

Life is like a roller coaster. When things go downhill, throw your hands in the air and smile!

Have you ever met someone whose life seems to be falling apart and they’re happy anyway? Have you ever thought, “Wait a minute, you’re supposed to be miserable and depressed!”

It’s true. There are some who are simply in denial, and who hope that the problems will go away if they just ignore them. However, there are others who feel happy even when things are going down because they know a secret.

These people can feel happy during a downturn because they know the ride never goes downhill forever. By law, it always turns upward again at the bottom – just like a roller coaster. They smile now because they’re focused on the longer term; and they’re already thinking about the joy and heights that life will take them to next.

Now, while we’re on this “roller coaster theme,” imagine you’ve saved for years to take your family to an exciting theme park on the other side of the country. You’ve pictured the laughter, the fun, the memories you plan to create: the joy of being together, the food, the free time; it’s all so very wonderful!

Now it’s finally time to take that trip. You enjoy a relaxing plane ride, settle in at the hotel, spend the night, and in the morning you have a full day to take in all of the theme park attractions. After entering the gate, you notice that just inside the entrance there are two roller coaster rides to choose from. The first one is called “Straight-Shot to Success” and goes like this:

“Straight Shot to Success”

You get on, and it pulls the line of cars all the way to the top of a twenty-story tower where ….

… it lets you off so you can climb down the stairs to do it again.

Look at the enthusiasm in this picture, just before unloading to climb down and repeat the experience all over again! (Wouldn’t it make for a pretty boring roller coaster ride? Yes. But isn’t that what we think we want out of life? A steady, predictable, safe and easy climb to success?) The thing is, if that’s what we got out of life, I think we’d feel pretty dissatisfied with the whole experience. Without the lows, the highs mean nothing.

So, let’s take a look at the second roller coaster ride called “Joy in the Journey,” which instead goes something like this:

“Joy in the Journey”

You get on, and it pulls you to the top of a big hill and then turns you loose into a series of ups and downs, loops and turns. Everyone is terrified and laughing, all at the same time.

Even when the people plummet at break-neck speeds straight toward the ground, they have a smile on their face.

Now, is that twisted, or what? Are they in denial?

No. They are genuinely enjoying themselves, because they know that the terror is temporary, that the danger is an illusion, and that it will come to an end. They know that they are in a controlled, safe environment that is simply giving them the appearance of danger. Deep down, they know everything is going to be okay in the long run.

Which rollercoaster ride do you think would have the longest waiting line? “Straight-Shot to Success,” or “Joy in the Journey?”

I choose the latter. Here’s what helps me endure the scary parts:

Believe it or not, like a roller coaster ride, Life itself is a safe environment, even with all its dangers.

Contrary to appearances, it truly is a safe place to be. From God’s vantage point, the things we fear are nothing to Him, including death itself.

Do you realize that the life you live is precisely the life you would have chosen all along? THIS is the life that brings you the greatest joy: the life with all the ups and aggravating downs. So be grateful for your downs, and as you allow your heart to swell with gratitude, you’re putting yourself into the right mindset to receive next the best “ups” that God has to offer.

The ups and downs we experience help us feel.

The change from up to down (or down to up) is precisely what makes it possible for us to recognize the difference from one emotion to the other. Like I said before, without the downs, the ups would be meaningless. The lows help us feel and appreciate the highs.

Bob Proctor says, “Most people tiptoe through life, trying to make it safely to death.” Do you see the irony in that? Instead, we should have courage and press on toward our dreams with full, fearless intention.

Fear not!

As Mark Twain said, “I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.”

You have a choice of what to think about. So think on the expected highs that put a smile on your face, instead of worrying about the imagined train wreck at the bottom of the hill that hasn’t even happened yet.

It is only when your heart is at peace that it is truly prepared to receive inspired solutions to your problems.

So, if you’re headed in a downward direction, be at peace. The tracks are bent and will surely guide your roller coaster car up to the top again in time. It’s going to be thrilling! And in fact, according to the Law of Rhythm, you’re already on your way. Originally published Mar 12, 2008

Join me in the life-changing Mindset Mastery Program and I’ll help you find joy and success even in the downs.

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The Rare Faith Project Team

A big thank you, to all who donate their time and talents to provide improved podcast transcripts for the deaf and hearing-impaired community. Having transcripts that are true to the audio also helps them be searchable, and more easily cross-referenced for the serious student of Rare Faith principles.

I am grateful to each of the following volunteers who have been working on this project:

Cassie Eriksen (UT) – #39: The 19 Rules of Prosperity – in process
Diane Ritman (AZ) – #38: Moms, Guilt, and Balance – in process
Roseanna Becraft (KY) – #37: Why do I do what I do – Done!
Tim Taormino (MD) – How to Make a Bestseller – Done!
Elizabeth Beuhring (UT) – #36: Monetizing Your Gifts – in process
Lori Squires (UT) – #35: Producer Power Hour – in process
Elaine Larsen (AZ) – #34: Succeeding With Your Talents – in process
Dixie Conger (UT) – #33: Reality is Not What You Think – in process
Michelle Jackson (UT) – #32: Teaching Children About Money – in process
Becky Glazier (AZ) – #31: Knowing Who You Really Are – Done!
Katrina Musanga – #30: Live your Purpose – in process
Patti Empey (Canada) – #29: Stay at Home Moms Making Money – in process
Linda Heywood (AZ) – #28: Parenting Principles Preview – in process
Jill Hemsley – #27: How to Profit from Your Losses – in process
Kathi Hausmann (AZ) – #26: Mission Impossible – in process
Angie Kleven (NV) – #25: A Leap of Faith – Done!
Denise Allen (UT) – #24: How to Know if You’ll Reach the Goal – in process
Stephanie Lee (OR) – #23: Mysterious, Uncanny Coincidences – in process
Renae Van Why (UT) – #22: Lessons Learned Since Writing JF – in process
Jan Lambert (ID) – #21: The Power of your Thoughts – in process
Bonnie Peterson (UT) – #20: Portal to Genius Virtual Book Tour – Done!
Amber Warren (CA) – #19: Making Cents out of Setbacks – in process
Alisa Hancock (TX) – #18: Making Money from Home – Done!
Ken Fong (CA) – #17: When a Mentor Fails You – Done!
Karen Schroeder (WY) and Jim Sumsion (UT) – #16: How to Surrender– Done!
Nan Hancock (ID) – #15: Hidden Treasures Class – in process
Joyce Pierce (TX) – #14: Portal to Genius Class – in process
Jill Hemsley (CA) – #13: Happiness, Security, and Fulfillment – Done!
Kimberly Reid (NV) – #12: Awaken Your Genius – part 1 – in process
Ann Boekweg – #11: Mission Impossible & Other Lies – in process
Tim Taormino (MD) – #10: When Change is Hard – Done!
Jane Simson (South Africa) – #9: Avoiding Painful Career Mistakes – in process
Toni Soderquist (UT) – #8: A Rare Kind of Faith – in process
Chandrie Carder (Wales) – #7: Does the Breakthrough Ever Come? – in process
Beth Thomas (SC) – #6: Belief Breakthrough – part 2 – in process
William Davis (UT) – #5: Simply Divine Principles – Done!
Kaylee Larsen (UT) – #4: Parenting with the 7 Laws – in process
Randy Soderquist (UT) – #3: Belief Breakthrough – part 1 – in process
Sue Stephenson (UT) – #2: How to RECEIVE – Done!
Janel Williams (UT) – #1: Trusting Your Instinct – in process
Linda Weitz (OR) – LBW 12: Hitting Your Target – Done!
Sheryl Johnson (UT) – LBW 11: Cents out of Setbacks – Short – Done!
Sheryl Johnson (UT) – LBW 10: Goal Achievement Like Using a Phone – Done!
Nagarajan Chidambaram (India) – LBW 09: It’s a Language Thing – Done!
Lucetta Lilly (UT) – LBW 08: Law of Relativity – Done!
Marne Traasdahl (AZ) – LBW 07: Law of Rhythm – Done!
Tim Taormino (MD) – LBW 06: I’m Doing Pretty Good – But – Done!
Tim Taormino (MD) – LBW 05: The Impossible Loan – Done!
Kathi Hausmann (AZ) – LBW 04: Perfectionism and Prosperity – Done!
Tim Taormino (MD) – LBW 03: Bleach and Blunders – Done!
Karen Hall (AZ) – LBW 02: Failure is Feedback – in process
Brandy Womack (CO) – LBW 01: Happy Without It – Done!

Amanda Johnson (UT), a special thanks for creating one of our very first transcripts before this project even got underway.

I am also grateful to all of the other volunteers who are not yet listed, but who are waiting in the wings for an assignment.

If you are interested in joining the Rare Faith Project Team of Volunteers to help with this (or other future projects) from the comfort of your own home, click here to learn more and let me know. Thanks!

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Decision, 8 Days before Eviction

Today’s Mindset Mastery Program participant spotlight is on Sherri C. She writes:

I don’t even know where to start. The Jackrabbit Factor came into my life at just the very right moment to “jackrabbit” my way through extreme hardship — the condo we had been leasing was foreclosed and sold (without anybody telling us, the tenants!) and we had to find a place to live, with three kids and a dog, during the school year, THAT quick — and it all worked out, beautifully, perfectly, magically — a wonderful home, with a swimming pool, even!! — without drugs, alcohol, breakdown or collapse, or even recurrent Shingles (stress brings it back). This was HUGE.

At one point during the whole thing, I wrote in my journal: “The first thing I will do when this all works out and we move into our beautiful new home [which we hadn’t found yet], I am going to order the entire Mindset Mastery program from Leslie Householder — first thing shipped to our new address!” (I wrote that March 22nd — 8 days before EVICTION, one day before we stumbled onto The Perfect House on an Internet listing, two days before we toured the house, negotiated and signed a lease, 8 days before we moved!)

I had to delay a bit, because of money issues — I had no idea how I would find the money to pay for this program, with the expenses of the move and not getting our lease deposits back (still working on this one, three months later). But not for long — on April 14th, when our accountant finished our tax returns, we discovered we had a $1500 REFUND coming back, when the year before we had to pay — that was the money!!

I am a chronic, obsessive worrier, especially about finances and money. The Mindset Mastery Program has been a God-send. It has taken me two months to get through Phase 1, and there have certainly been times when I have been discouraged or doubtful, but overall, the abundance in my life, the love, peace and harmony from the hope and confidence in these principles and Universal Laws is life-changing.

I have so many goals and dreams, and sometimes I get impatient, but, as I have learned in this course: When I have a choice, I choose to believe. And all those goals and dreams, the abundance in my life, is already happening.

I am very excited to start Phase 2!

Live, Love & Laugh,

Sherri C.

Learn more about the Mindset Mastery program here.

The 12-week Mindset Mastery Program is not to be confused with the 8-week Mindset Fundamentals Ecourse. The Fundamentals Ecourse is a powerful exploration of the principles that govern success, and takes an introductory approach for effective goal setting. By contrast, the Mastery Program is more focused on the *implementation* of the principles and the *achievement* of your goals. It is full of interesting assignments that take you step-by-step through two experimental goals, challenging your thought processes, helping you experience success, and setting up a pattern in your thinking that you will be able to utilize over and over for effectiveness with all of your future goals. I hope you’ll join me in one of these programs, to help you take your understanding and success to the next level in ALL the different areas of your life.

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Volunteers Wanted

We are looking for volunteers to help us make the Podcast episodes easier to search and study. Will you be one of them?

(We may also have other projects in the future, so if you’re interested in joining our Rare Faith Project Volunteer Team, keep reading…)

As you may know, I’ve been teaching the principles of Rare Faith since 2000 (although I haven’t always called them that – the new term was adopted a few years ago for this reason). My objective has been to provide a wealth of information available at no charge, and to keep the more advanced trainings at an affordable rate. Literally tens of thousands of hours have gone into this project, and there is still much to do.

To keep costs down and services free or affordable, we sometimes rally volunteers who believe in the cause to help us finish projects from the comfort of their own home.

Right now, we are working to provide ACCURATE transcripts for each of the podcasts, so that the content is searchable and more easily cross-referenced with other podcasts and related articles.

There are approximately 50 podcasts, and we already have an auto-generated version of each one, but they have errors. So we need people like you who are willing to listen carefully to a podcast, check the transcript for errors, and make the needed corrections. When the transcriptions are complete and ready, they will be added to the podcast episodes hosted here at my blog.

As it is explained in Portal to Genius, building mental capital and relationship capital can yield great benefits. Helping us make the podcasts searchable does both, and I’d love to have you on board.

Corrections needed may include:

  • Adding missing words/phrases
  • Adding proper capitalization and punctuation
  • Removing hard returns
  • Adding a speaker’s name before his/her line (if there are multiple people speaking)
  • Correcting words and phrases that may have been misheard by the auto-generator

It is estimated that, for every 5 minutes of audio, it can take anywhere from 10 minutes to 1 hour to make the needed corrections.

If you become part of the team, you will select an episode (choose a topic you’ve already wanted to learn well) and return the edited version via email within 2 weeks. If it takes longer than 2 weeks, that’s okay! We just don’t want any of the podcasts tied up indefinitely. If you need more time, just let me know.

If you are interested, please click here and tell me why you want to participate.

If you are approved for the team, you’ll be sent project instructions where you’ll make your first podcast selection.

Thank you for your help!

Leslie

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When Have I Done Enough?

Years ago, my friend Natalie taught a lesson during our women’s meeting at church about “Having Temperance in All Things”, which had a profound effect on me. I’d like to share my epiphany.

First, let’s establish a definition:

Temperance = moderation and self-restraint

Before her lesson, I’d say I easily understood the concept of “moderation” in terms of harmful substances (like sweets), or addictive behaviors (like binge-watching your favorite shows). But when I thought about what temperance in ALL things means, I had some trouble.

For example, I was never very good at knowing how to be temperate in goal achievement. I’d aim high, and then I’d overbook myself and get overwhelmed by all that needed to be accomplished.

I didn’t know at what point I could take a break and say, “I’ve done enough.”

Part of the problem was that I truly had the mindset that I could do anything – and that there was no such thing as doing “too much”.  I didn’t always know how to temper my ambitions, because frankly, they helped me achieve some things that I was pretty happy about.

However, sometimes my mortal body couldn’t keep up with the pace of my thoughts and expectations, and so predictably, I went through periods of unbridled ambition, followed by periods of crashing and burning, until I regained my strength to start it all over again.

I’m telling you, that kind of pattern can eventually break a person, like bending a metal rod back and forth until it finally snaps.

According to the Law of Cause and Effect, I knew that each time I took a step toward my goal, it took a step toward me. So I wondered, “How could it ever be okay to stop stepping?” Well, that morning before church it felt like I was on the verge of another crash-and-burn, so I prayed for insight. I wanted to know how I could keep making progress without burning myself out or incinerating my relationships.

We got to church and during the third hour, I joined the ladies meeting.

That’s when Natalie, at the front of the room, began. She said:

I like to make cookies.  In fact, I have a wonderful recipe for Chocolate Chip Cookies that just works. Over the years I’ve used it, as long as I follow the right steps, we predictably end up with perfectly delicious cookies.

If I set the timer for 13 minutes and take them out when it dings, they’re perfect.  But if I get busy and ignore the timer, pretty soon I’ll start to smell them, and by then it’s too late. Even if I get a whiff and then run to take them out, it’s too late. They’ll be hard, dark, and good for nothing, except to be thrown away.

So, after mixing all the ingredients together, letting them bake is one of the most important parts – otherwise, you just don’t have a cookie. But baking them for the right amount of time determines whether or not they will turn out good. That’s why the timer is so important: to help you make sure the cookies don’t burn.

Life is the same way.

When you’re trying to accomplish something good, your energy and attention on the goal is one of the most important parts, like heat in the oven baking a batch of cookies.  However, you’ve got to turn off the energy and attention when the “timer” dings, or you just might ruin it all. So listen for (and heed) that inner voice that says, “Ding! That’s enough…”

Wow. I got it. I finally understood how too much of a good thing can be bad.

That lesson had a profound and lasting effect on me. I was amazed and grateful that the Lord answered my question so directly, so clearly, and so quickly! For the first time in my life I could finally understand that yes, there IS such thing as too much, and if you push the limits, you run the risk of ruining everything.

Too much of even the most wonderful things can turn into something bad. So remember:

When the “dinger” rings, it’s not just okay to stop, it’s critical!

Finding that middle place, finding your “13 minutes”, is so important. We have to trust that it is by “small and simple things” (instead of longer-than necessary intensity on things) that “great things are brought to pass”. Choosing this belief and abiding by it is an act of faith of the highest order.

After my epiphany that day, I tried to listen more carefully to the Spirit of God that serves as my “timer”. It quietly alerts me when I’m pushing things too long or too far. And instead of rationalizing that “I can still do MORE!”, I try to remember burnt cookies, so that 1) my goal can get just the right amount of energy, and 2) so that I can also avoid burning myself out as well.

As for the Law of Cause and Effect? Well, sometimes the right action is to take no action at all.

Natalie concluded her lesson that day by giving us each a perfectly formed cookie and saying:

“Careful baking is what determines the quality of my cookie, and temperance in my actions determines the quality of my life.”

Thank you, Natalie, for being an instrument in God’s hands that day. My prayer was answered (and my family thanks you for it, too!)  🙂 Originally published Mar 27, 2010


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Hope Like a Balloon

Hot air balloons. Helium balloons. Truly magical, if you don’t understand the science behind their buoyancy. And even magical if you do, in my opinion.

Do you remember how it was to experience your first helium balloon?  When you were a child, were you astounded at how everything else you knew fell downward… except that beautiful, shiny ball in the air? It did two things: it ascended upward, and it helped you feel happier.

As you got older, maybe you allowed it to become more of a a commonplace phenomenon.

Even now, every time I stop to think about it, my spirits are lifted as I watch the pull of a balloon rising in the opposite direction of everything else around it.

All it is, is a container full of a gas that happens to be lighter than the oxygen/carbon dioxide mixture in the air, and when a balloon is full of a gas that is lighter than the gas mixture of its surroundings, it naturally rises above them.

Our thoughts, kept buoyant by focusing on the positive, also have the ability to pull US up and out of downer circumstances.

Every time you consciously choose a solution-oriented, hopeful, enthusiastically-expectant-of-good-things kind of thought, you fill your MIND with stuff that is lighter in nature than the common thoughts of negativity and discouragement.

It’s science:

Hopeful, buoyant thoughts do more than just help you feel good; they literally LIFT you above adversity like helium in a balloon.

So fill your mind with light-thinking, and in time, you’ll naturally rise above the gunk. The stuff that pulls you down will fall out of your life, like ballast out of a hot air balloon.

For a tank full of helium of the mind, I strongly recommend joining me in the Mindset Mastery Program.

I’ll help you keep your thoughts buoyant. I’ll give you REASON to hope, and a valid reason to have it, too. I’ll fill your mind with the stuff that will help you rise above your challenges, no matter what they are.

To your success! Originally published Oct 27, 2009

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#37: Why do I do what I do when I know what I know

In this episode, I join Dr. Paul Jenkins on his radio show, Live on Purpose Radio. Dr. Paul says, “The most common lament I hear in my psychology practice is this question: Why do I do what I do, when I know what I know?” For this topic, Dr. Paul calls together a brain trust to take on this question.

For more about Dr. Paul, visit drpauljenkins.com

TRANSCRIPT:

Welcome to the Rare Faith Podcast, where the solution to every problem is only an idea away and where the same activity, with just a little more awareness, always yields better results. Award-winning, best-selling author, Leslie Householder, brings some of her best information to this inspiring series of life-changing episodes that you won’t want to miss. Show notes for this episode can be found at ararekindoffaith.com

This is Dr. Paul, the shrink, who expands your life.

Today, I had an idea that I think is really going to play out nicely. I have called together a brain trust. I guess we can call it that. I’ve been talking a little bit lately with a few of my associates, talking about a particular problem that we all face or a challenge or a very common obstacle, maybe, to success and prosperity. And, before we get into that topic, I’m gonna introduce our brain trust to you. I’ve got in the studio with me, Shaye Larson.

Shaye: Hello, everybody.

Dr. Paul: Hey, Shaye. Welcome back.

Shaye: Thank you.

Dr. Paul: It’s been a little while since you’ve been on Live on Purpose Radio.

Shaye: It’s always a pleasure.

Dr. Paul: That’s not exactly true. You’re on almost every week.

Shaye: That’s right.

Dr. Paul: With The World of Ideas Report

Shaye: That’s right.

Dr. Paul: So, you are the idea guru.

Shaye: Right

Dr. Paul: And that’s why you are part of this brain trust today, Shaye.

Shaye: Glad to be here.

Dr. Paul: You got it turned on? You ready to go?

Shaye: It’s an honor. Yes it is.

Dr. Paul: On the phone lines, we have a national best-selling author, Leslie Householder.

Leslie: Hello everybody.

Dr. Paul: Hey. Welcome, Leslie.

Leslie: Thank you.

Dr. Paul: So glad to have you with us, too, and our listeners are going to be very familiar with you by now, because we quote you all the time and that book, The Jackrabbit Factor and another one that you’ve published called Hidden Treasures have been so powerful in my life personally, but in the lives of a lot of our audience and so, we’re just thrilled to have you with us again today.

Leslie: Thank you so much, my pleasure.

Dr. Paul: And you are a part of this brain trust, too, because here’s the thing. Let me just set up this topic and then we’ll have some discussion. In the last couple of years, I’ve become a little bit of a junkie for personal improvement and inspirational content and seminars. You know, that kind of stuff, and I just can’t get enough of it and I go to these events or I listen to a CD set or a program and I get all excited and I think, wow that is so cool and it’s just resonating with me. You know, it’s just ringing and then I go home and I kind of get back into some of my old habits and my old patterns and sometimes things don’t change as much as I thought they would while I was sitting there in the seminar. Now, am I just weird or does this happen a lot?

Shaye: Well, I can tell you from my coaching background. This is a core question that seems to come up through everybody in different language. They don’t always say, “Why can’t I do what I want to do,” but through different language, it always comes up that they have desire. They actually know the answers.

Dr. Paul: Often they do.

Shaye: Yeah, a coach can reveal answers to people and it’s like, yeah, I know that, but help me do it. And a good coach focuses on helping people do things. So it comes up all the time and I feel like the challenge there, the solution to this challenge is epic proportions in anyone’s life. I mean we’re talking about a real problem here, why can’t I do, what I want to do. I know what to do. I know I’ve got to be a better person. I know I’ve got to help these people more. I know I want to get rid of my fear. I know I want to be a better husband, a better provider, a better this and that. Why don’t I just go do it? What stops me? What’s all that stuff that keeps me from doing that, waking up in the morning and being someone that just goes and does it?

Dr. Paul: Um hum.

Shaye: That’s the question and the value to getting this answered in your life is incredible.

Leslie: You know, I’d like to say that you described the scenario of attending a seminar, feeling really great, feeling like there’s changes taking place inside of you and then coming home and very quickly going back into the old habits and wondering if it was even worth the trouble of going in the first place. And, that was my life all through the 1990s, especially.

We were seminar junkies. My husband and I attended at least a hundred seminars over those years and the reason we kept going is because while we were there, it gave us enough expansion. We felt the growth. We felt something happening inside that was good. Then when we’d go home and we’d feel that go away, we thought, well then, we’ve got to get back and do it again, and go again.

And, you know, if you start questioning whether or not it’s a waste of time, you do start questioning if it’s even worth the trouble, because, you know, I’ve had people tell me, “Oh, I don’t want to go to something like that, because the way it makes me feel just doesn’t last.” And, over the years, I’ve come to the conclusion, well you know what. Breakfast didn’t last either.

Dr. Paul: Right.

Leslie: We need to get over the notion that it has to be a one moment that’s going to change everything, although, those moments do happen. I like to compare it with like a combination lock that has, say it’s one of those kinds that takes about 5 or 6 different pieces. The tumblers have to fall into place, one at a time and I look back and I remember all the things that I learned over the years and at each event I learned something new. At each event it was like one of those tumblers falling into place.

And eventually, it happened for me at a point where I was just ready to just throw in the towel and say this is the last one I will ever go to, when that last tumbler fell into place. Gratefully, the timing is no coincidence, but I went to the very end of all I could handle on my own, trusting that if the answers don’t come here and now, then I’m just going to have to figure out how to be happy the way things are, even if nothing ever changes, because I knew what I needed to be doing, but I was having a hard time figuring out why I wasn’t doing it, just like you were saying.

Dr. Paul: Um hmm

Leslie: And so, you know, it was at that event that the final tumbler fell into place, the lights turned on and I suddenly saw everything that we had learned over the years in a whole new light. And it became the catalyst for the change. Suddenly, I did start behaving differently, without the effort that it required, that it took prior. All of a sudden, there was a shift inside of me that said, this is my new me and I am being different. And then the results were different. It was all very simple, but it took a long time to get each of those tumblers into place.

And so I think it’s really important, number one, to be willing to continue studying, continuing your education and trusting that the right pieces are going to fall into place at the right time and literally, two people are going to sit in an event and each of them take different notes because of who they are, where they’re at, the questions that they have already formulated in their minds and even if you were to go back to the same one another time, you’re a different person, you’re going to get something different out of it.

And, it’s not just seminars. It’s the books you read. It’s the mentors you listen to. It’s all of this, so I think that there’s so much to be gained from trusting in the process.

Dr. Paul: And persisting. That’s part of what I heard from you, Leslie. I think you have to go just a little farther than you think you can.

Leslie: Exactly. It’s frustrating sometimes and I get mad about that.

Dr. Paul: Well, by definition, you’re going beyond your comfort zone and that’s a very difficult thing to get yourself to do. I thought a lot about this particular phrase and it’s become kind of a theme for some of the coaching that I’m doing. It is, “Why do I do what I do when I know what I know.”

I think that everyone of us, if you’ll just be honest with yourself, you know things that you’re not applying. And I think that’s true at any level, that you already know some things that you could do to improve your life. And, I joke around this sometimes in seminars that I do. I challenge the attendees. I tell them, “Ok, if I were to send you out there, in the next half hour could you find some way to make your life worse?”

Shaye: That would take about 30 seconds.

Dr. Paul: It gets a chuckle every time, because they were thinking along those lines, but as soon as I suggest that to them, oh yeah, they could come up with a dozen things that would, for sure, make their life worse.

Leslie: That wouldn’t be hard to do.

Dr. Paul: No, not at all, but to change that the other direction, now I could ask you, “Could you go out there in the next half hour and do something that would make your life better?” Well, they can come up with those answers, too. So, why aren’t we doing the things that we know? And that’s the purpose of this brain trust today.

Shaye: Well, one thing I can start us off with is, the answer isn’t gonna come like most people are seeking, what kind of answer they’re seeking. They’re seeking a quick solution to this, a 3-step program or, you know, an answer that makes sense to them right now. And that is why people end up spending so much time and energy looking for what some authors have called ‘magic dust’.

People are seeking this knowledge and I can tell you, the pursuit of success is not an intellectual pursuit alone. However, it’s a lot easier to accept that, that if I can just get these pieces of this puzzle fit together in my brain, all this other stuff’s going to get fixed.

So you’ve got to focus in on this word, this ‘do’ word, this action word. Because here’s the challenge and there’s a lot of success books, a lot of success seminars and I have plugged the majority of them. They’ve been a great part of my life. However, some of them avoid this part of the conversation.

Dr. Paul: This is the hard part.

Shaye: This is the hard part. And the reason that it gets avoided is because it’s not marketable. You’re not going to sell a book right now in today’s world that says “Work Your Hind Off (I’ll keep this PG), Work Hard and Have Success.”

Dr. Paul: Yeah

Shaye: Now, I would probably buy that book, because I would be interested in the truth, but it’s a lot easier to put a book out there that says, ”The ONE Secret, The ONE Little Piece You’ve Been Missing, Here It Is.” And, it isn’t ‘do,’ it’s knowledge. When you get this clicked in your brain, it’s all over.

Dr. Paul: Knowledge is power, right?

Shaye: Yeah, knowledge is power and that is definitely a part of it. I don’t ever want to put out the picture that, you know, let’s forget about the knowledge, the intellectual pursuit here and just skip over and start taking action for no reason.

Dr. Paul: Well, that would be like moving rocks in your backyard. Let’s move a rock to this side, then let’s move it to this side and then back. That’s like Bill Cosby makes fun of his little daughter, who is, the dogs are following her around saying, “Oh, she’s going over this way. Oh, now she’s gonna go over this way and put the water over here. Isn’t this fun? Now, we’re gonna go over here and put the water in.” That’s kind of what it’s like doing without acquiring the knowledge.

Dr. Paul: We’ll be right back.

Music/Commercial: Thank you for joining me for the Live on Purpose Radio Podcast. It is truly an honor to be a part of your prosperity team. Please visit my website, drpaul.org to get connected with other tools for you and your family. There you will find links to my weekly ezine, Empower, harnessing the power of the mind and to the free Parental Power Teleconference that I host every week with my wife, Vicki. You can also check out upcoming events or pick up powerful information products. Feel free to contact me directly with questions, comments or to book me for your company or private event. Email me through DrPaul@LiveonPurposeRadio.com
Dr. Paul: I tell you what, we’re going to start leaving the mics on during the commercials.

Shaye: Don’t do that.

Dr. Paul: That’s some good stuff happening. Leslie, I don’t know if you heard any of that.

Leslie: All I heard was laughter. I’m like, “What am I missing.”

Dr. Paul: Oh, boy. Well, you know what, I was having a chat with one of my friends just yesterday, who was talking about all these multi-level marketing companies that are out there and he’s tried a number of them. Many of us have, you know, especially if you’re entrepreneurial minded. Many have tried these things before and he was saying, “You know, the thing that bugs me the most about this is that they’re all out there trying to sell ‘magic goo’.” And you were talking about ‘magic dust’, well this is ‘magic goo’. Right? You can drink it and it will cure cancer and you can lubricate your car and you can wash your dog. You know? It just does everything. Right?

As you were talking, Shaye, I was thinking, you know, how about ‘magic do’ instead of ‘magic goo’?

Leslie: You know, can I interject on the work topic? I think there are a lot of listeners who are not afraid of work. I think back to all the work that my husband and I put into trying to create a different life for ourselves. I mean literally round the clock, odd hours, burning the candle at both ends like from my book, the dog chasing the rabbit and very few people saw a rabbit and thought we were nuts. And the thing that was most frustrating to me was that the work wasn’t producing results for us. That was where the need for the education came in to help us understand how to do effective work. We weren’t afraid of the work and I think most people aren’t afraid to do the work, but they get frustrated when they do the work and they don’t get the results they want, which takes us to a whole different level.

It’s more than just, why do I do what I do when I know what I know or why don’t I do what I know I should do, when I know what I know. But what about, why do I do what I do and get the results that aren’t what I expect and the point I want to make on this is, the thing I learned is that there is a piece of us inherently designed to keep us safe. It’s the part of us that keeps our heart beating all day long. It’s the part of us that keeps us breathing through the night. I mean if you were to consciously have to remind yourself to beat that heart of yours, how long would you have lasted on this planet?

Dr. Paul: Um Hum

Leslie: You know there is a piece of us that is designed to keep us safe and it’s also the piece of us that has an image of who we are and what we are entitled to. And so, when we do work to accomplish something that is contrary to what that inside belief looks like, the part of us that keeps us safe, that doesn’t want status quo to change, is going to have an influence on the results, no matter how much work we put. So, it’s so important to put the pieces together, the work and the understanding on how to change that part of us that wants to keep us safe and it’s not there to sabotage us, it’s just trying to keep us safe and what safe means to me and anyone of us is that change is not always safe. What I experience now, yeah, I may not like it, but it’s the devil I know.

Shaye: You know, Leslie that makes me think of two things, one concerning ‘do’ and one concerning the knowledge. Concerning the work, somebody that has a challenge getting to work and I know a few of these individuals personally. Some of them come to my coaching programs where they do know what to do. They know what they need to do and it just becomes this matter of, oh I just can’t get in the habit of it. I’ve gotta hire an exercise coach. I’ve gotta hire, you know, somebody to keep me accountable. And, there’s value in that, in having people that help you stay accountable. However, if you look at the root cause of that person, why can’t they get it done, why can’t they stick to it?
One thing I’ve found is, they haven’t counted the cost of what they’re doing. They haven’t taken a moment to step back, and actually, for me personally, it’s more than a moment. It’s a period of my life, where, if I’m gonna take on something, I need to count the cost of that and the principle of counting the cost is, it’s taught in the scriptures, it’s taught in the lessons of some of the most successful people in the world, but to actually sit back and say, “Am I willing to do what it takes to make this happen?” That mental process doesn’t happen quite often for some people because they would see what’s exciting about it. They would see, I want that. Yeah, that looks great. I want to have that. I want to have the happiness. I want to have the wealth. I want to have all that stuff. And then it’s like, What do I gotta do? And they just jump into the process.

For them, it’s a negative response to have to let their brain process the difficulties they might face, the challenges that come up. It’s almost taboo for them to think, oh, I might have to deal with problems. Their mind is set to, let’s just be positive, let’s think positive about this. And there’s a lot of wealth in positive thinking, but it is not negative to count the cost of what you’re about to do and to make sure that you are willing to go through that, because what ends up happening as they start that action, most individuals, this is by my experience, the first serious obstacle that comes up tosses them right out of the water or it becomes a process of wearing them down. Four, five, six, seven trials, I’ve had enough, I’m out, except for the person as, Andy Andrews puts it, that has a decided heart, the person that has taken that time to really count the cost of this and know what this means to their lives. Are they gonna really do this and accept that. Then it’s not a battle every day to make another decision. See, once they’ve made one decision to do this and they’ve done it the right way, they don’t have to wake up the next day, thinking, am I gonna do this. Okay, yes, I’m going to do it. The next day, am I gonna do this. Yes I’m gonna do it. The next day, I don’t know, maybe. They don’t waive that decision. That’s a very tiring process to go through.

Leslie: That wears you out, for sure.

Shaye: The other point on the knowledge side is, if you look at those that are willing to do the work, they’re willing to go through all that and work hard. I know these people, too. They interpret the knowledge different. I think Bruce Lee put it best with this one. I love his analogies because he’s a martial artist and it always applies to some kick, whoom, shoom, flying around. Well, Bruce Lee said that he cannot give you of his cup, meaning he can’t show you how he does what he does, if your cup is full of your own opinions. Or, to put that in more modern terms, if you’re so full of your own opinions, if you’re so caught up with the way that you see the world, you’re not open to a new perspective and that’s what it takes. Some people think as soon as you prove to me that this is different knowledge, then I will empty some of my cup and put it in, but the truth is, you’ve got to let that out and become a student, coachable and at that point you’re open to some new information. So, how do we put these two together is the real question.

Dr. Paul: mm-hmm

Leslie: Yeah. So, Shaye, how do you tell people or what does ‘counting the cost’ mean, when they don’t know perhaps what it’s going to require?

Shaye: This is always interesting to me that several books, coaches and so forth teach the principle of meditation or they teach it as a strategy, when the truth is, the meditation for me or the taking a moment in your life to get clear, that is nothing more than a vehicle of what you’re really doing.

For instance, I’ll put this into an example, if you have a goal to get something and you really want that goal, you know if this is a goal that you’re really gonna do, by measuring it. If the goal promotes you or if you’re promoting the goal and what I mean by that, say you set a goal and you want something really bad and you wake up the next morning and you have to convince yourself to go get it, you probably don’t have a goal that really resonates with you, that you’re gonna go do.

If you have a goal that you wake up in the morning, you’re like, ooh, what I got to do, and the goal is promoting you, the goal is picking you up and you found one that really fits inside your heart and so, for me this meditation and getting clear on yourself, that’s not the strategy that’s just what ends up happening.

The real part, that you’ve got to say I want to do this, is taking a moment of your life, whatever it takes, whatever works for you, whether it’s yoga or meditation or going for a drive or just getting away from your environment, turning the cellphones off and taking a moment to get clear with yourself, praying, whatever your form of getting clear is, that has to happen. You have to take a moment and look at this.

How does it apply to my life and you’re gonna know if it’s bogus if it is just some material thing that’s out there and it really doesn’t apply right now to your life. If, for instance, you want some big, huge mansion and you’re living in a shack, you know what, you maybe got some other challenges. Maybe that is important to your life right now, you know, but my experience is, most the people I work with, when we get right down to it, money, itself, is not on their real list, but it’s a shock to them to find that out.

Leslie: It’s what they think the money will do for them and that’s what you’ve got to identify and get clear.

Shaye: Right.

Dr. Paul: mm hmm

Dr. Paul: And it has to resonate with some greater purpose for you. And as you’re talking about that Shaye, I was thinking, you know, there are times when, it’s not that I wake up in the morning and then think, oh yeah I’ve got this goal. It’s that this goal wakes me up, right? And it’s four o’clock in the morning, right? It’s like, get up, come on, lets go. It’s like my dog wanting to go for a walk. It’s wiggling all over the place.

Shaye: That’s when you know you’ve got a goal that really works with your heart and then you probably naturally are going to start taking time to think about it. You’re gonna start thinking how does this work? How am I gonna do this, instead of you sitting there, oh that’s right, my coach told me I gotta meditate, so I’m sitting there, okay, I’m meditating, I’m thinking. You’re practicing a strategy without working on a root cause.

Dr. Paul: Right.

Leslie: You know, and I tell people that you have to fall in love with the goal and they’ll say, well how often do you have to read your affirmation or your goal statement or whatever it is like that and I’m thinking you know, if you’re in love with the goal, you’re not going to have to remind yourself to think about it. How many times did you have to remind yourself to think about your fiancé?

Dr. Paul: mm-hmm

Leslie: You couldn’t help but think about them and that’s what a goal with this kind of power has. Now I remember watching Rudy, if you remember the football, Rudy, long ago.

Dr. Paul: Oh yeah.

Leslie: And at the time in my life, when I watched that, I loved it. I was empowered by his passion for his goal, but I came away from it really disappointed, because the thought that went through my head is, I wish I could be that passionate about something and I started looking for a dream, because nothing I wanted at that time had that kind of power for me and I didn’t know how to create that. I didn’t know how to find that and maybe when we get back, I’ll tell you what I learned.

Dr. Paul: Great.

Shaye: That’d be great. Thanks, Leslie.

Dr. Paul: We were just left hanging on the edges of our seats. Leslie, you’re talking about this, this passion, just having this, this desire to have something that compelled you to move and to have that kind of passion. You gotta finish your story.

Leslie: Yes, well I forgot what I was going to say.

Dr. Paul: Oh, no.

Leslie: Just kidding. Well you know, like I said, I had watched Rudy. I was inspired by it, but I was frustrated because I wanted to feel that way about something and every time I thought I had my eye on a goal that I could really love, a week later, the passion was gone. It wasn’t getting me out of bed. It wasn’t inspiring me or motivating me to do anything. It was just all I could do just to want to get out of bed and that’s not how you feel when you really have your eye locked on a goal that you can put your heart behind and one thing I learned was that there is a true principle that says, seek and ye shall find, and it was at that moment that I started really looking for a dream with that kind of pull for me.

Dr. Paul: mm-hmm

Leslie: And essentially what it came down to was, beforehand I was looking for goals, but all of a sudden I started looking for a goal that could create that kind of passion in me, and here this was setting a goal to find a goal. That’s a goal. See what I’m saying? The principle works on any level.

So I started looking and what came wasn’t a goal that had that kind of passion for me. Instead, what came my way were experiences that took me through a new kind of set of challenges that I wasn’t really excited about having and yet it carved out a place in my heart for the goal that I could love. And so, you know, I started looking for something that would create that kind of passion. What came from that seeking, was a run of experiences that were very difficult, very, very challenging and started leading me to ask new questions and started putting me in a place that when I finally got a glimpse of what the goal could be, it was the one I would love and you know one of the things I did know is, I wanted to make a difference.

I knew that I wanted to do something that would improve lives and at the time when I had this question when I had watched Rudy, my son, he was a new baby, had had heart problems when he was born and so at four days old he went into Primary Children’s and had heart surgery and the whole experience gave me a whole new compassion for people who stay at the Ronald McDonald House like we did and for people who have children with very severe health problems and when he came out okay on the other side of that I thought, I have a passion. I want to make a bunch of money so that I can donate it to the hospital and a week later it wasn’t there anymore and I thought what is wrong with me that I can’t have a goal that just drives me, you know, and that’s when I asked this question. I want to find something that can make a difference, that really drives me and so it took me through experiences that would give me empathy with a new pool of people in the world and then once I had come out on the other side of that and I got answers on how to solve my own problem, I had so much passion in helping people, who had experienced what I had experienced, come through on the other side like I had, this driving passion to help others overcome what we had overcome.

That was bigger than us. That was something that kept me awake at night. That was something, because I knew the pain and I knew the solution and sometimes you can’t have a solution that you can offer, add value to the world, and bring the solution unless you’ve experienced the pain first and at the time I was watching Rudy, I hadn’t experienced enough pain yet. You know what, I’m not saying that to just tell everybody that they need to have a lot of pain before they will find their passion, but you’re going to find that a passion for you is going to stem from your unique experiences.

Shaye: And, I don’t think we need to be afraid of this pain because if you’ll be honest with yourself, you know, you’re probably already experiencing some pain.

Leslie: Yeah, exactly.

Shaye: And, it’s really tempting sometimes to feel that pain and then to conclude that you have failed and I see people doing this all the time with, “Oh crap, I must be doing it wrong because look at how much pain I’ve got in my life and look at all this. What if you could reframe that to see it as the middle part of a really inspiring story and as you get through that, then you have the resources to really move forward and truly have an inspiring story.

Leslie: And haven’t you met people, who are in the middle of really, really awful, horrible situations who are going through them with an intention already in place to share what they learn on the other side of it?

Dr. Paul: mm-hmm

Leslie: I mean I’ve met people who are in the middle of really atrocious, atrocious situations, but they’ve already determined that one day they’re going to speak to people on how to get through this, even though they hadn’t quite figured out themselves yet.

Shaye: What a great story this is gonna make.

Leslie: Yeah, exactly.

Shaye: I’ve actually asked clients before, please get through this because the world needs your story. The world needs this testament to whatever problem you’re going through.

Dr. Paul: mm-hmm

Shaye: I was thinking while you were mentioning that, of something that happened to me once when I was kind of at a pinnacle in my career, at least I felt like it was at that time. I was starting to have a lot of success, in my definition of it, and was enjoying my work and I was invited to speak at some larger events, you know, thousands of people, not just a few hundred, and I thought that was a great thing and one of my first times speaking in front of a large crowd, there was a couple thousand people in the room and I got up and what I said made them laugh. They were taking it serious and everything worked and I got off the stage and I just felt great and a lady came up to me and she said, “Boy, you’re amazing. I wish I could be like that someday.”

That comment that she made to me made me realize that I sent the wrong message to her. She’d learned that, that type of accomplishment is even further away from her, rather than seeing it closer to her. So when we talk about people working hard, we’ve got to be careful not to distance people who are getting on the path and they feel like they’re having some success, not to distance those kinds of things from us.

When I think of some of the greatest examples in my life and most of them are dead now, Gandhi, Mother Teresa, these kind of people, you know, people that have had a huge impact on the world. One thing that I love to study, I can give you a book reference. If you want to study an amazing life, study the life of Jacques Lusseyran, a Frenchman. He was a blind man, who had an incredible life throughout the World War II, but another one is Gandhi. Gandhi amazes me.

The reason I like to study these kinds of lives is because as the world would put it, they had nothing and they demonstrated incredible power or what we’re talking about today, incredible “do.” They made things happen. Their actions, like when we talk about working hard and not accomplishing much, their actions accomplished incredible amounts and that’s why I like to study them. I also like to study people that the world considers that they didn’t have anything before they started, because it removes any temptation to believe that they received some kind of financial assistance and that was why they had success or whatever. It’s a pure story.

Well, Gandhi is a very interesting story because it’s one of the cleanest stories I know of somebody demonstrating actual power, versus worldly power and we get caught up in trying to know how to do this, what to do, how to put this knowledge together, because a lot of times we’re making a mistake of thinking that we have to demonstrate worldly power. We have to put on a persona that we’re more than we really are. We can’t have that kind of real estate portfolio until we have millions coming from something else. We can’t have that many income streams until we’ve had a lucky breakthrough. Those are all demonstrations of worldly power and they are the weakest form of power. True power comes from a divine power. Don’t know if this is a spiritual forum here, but that’s how it is.

Dr. Paul: Guess it is now.

Shaye: It’s a divine power and if you want to access that kind of power, then you have to understand that it comes through practice of faith the way that faith is truly defined. Faith is defined with work, but work on purpose, as Dr. Paul’s theme is called Live on Purpose. Gandhi was living on purpose. He did not have to ask himself before he went and got beat up by a mob, if it was worth it or not. Is this really worth it for me to go through this? He didn’t have to fast for seven days a couple times and almost kill himself to demonstrate a principle to people. He didn’t have to ask himself, “Is this worth it?”

He understood why he was doing it. He knew this was a thing that he could accomplish in this life and he counted the cost before he did it and no matter what trial came up, he went through it with faith and courage and that’s what it takes for us, too, to go through our challenges, trials, whatever. If we are connected with what we’re doing, why we’re I doing it, and we feel like this is something that we are sent here to do, it really doesn’t matter what trials are gonna come up. It doesn’t matter if the economy is falling around us. It doesn’t matter if your health takes a turn for the worse. You’re gonna have faith and courage and you’re gonna have a great attitude. Yeah, you’re gonna go through hard times. That’s part of it, but the way that you do that, the way you do what you do. Are you a do, do? Are you a do, don’t? Be a do, do.

Dr. Paul: Be a do, do. I’m not sure if we’re gonna be able to market that. You know what, as you’re talking about this, though, really that perspective is so powerful, that this adversity or this challenge that I’m facing right now is the middle part of a very inspiring story and if you have that perspective, you’re not at the end. You’re at the middle and that’s a huge, huge difference.

Shaye: And I would challenge that people that are in that place right now, if they’re feeling like they’re burdened, they’re challenged, they just haven’t taken a moment to count whether this is worth it or not. It might be. They might step back, look how this business I’ve been trying to build for five years, it’s just all over the place and I’m stressed. Maybe they didn’t step back and just decide, is this worth it or not. If they do and they go back they may gain the power that they need to get through that or they might find out, I don’t have anything like this and it’s time to make a change.

Leslie: I’d like to even touch on the point that was made on work that is on purpose and just work. And in my lingo, it goes back to the jackrabbit factor and the whole definition of what that means. If you see a dog chasing a rabbit, that can’t see the rabbit, you’d think the dog was crazy, but on the next level of that, if you see a dog chasing a rabbit and finally catching one and you realize that all of those actions were for the rabbit, you’re not going to go out there and just jump and bark and do all the same work, expecting a rabbit’s gonna appear. That’s work without purpose. You have to see the rabbit before the work makes sense.
Shaye: So work on purpose.

Dr. Paul: Here’s the thing, you guys. We have one segment left. We’re coming up on the end of this particular episode. For me, it’s really important to get some kind of take home from this thing and so I want to invite our brain trust, here, to share what are the take-home messages from this.

So what? You know, we started out with this question, “Why do I do what I do when I know what I know? Why don’t I do what I Know?” We all know more than we’re doing and we’ve talked about a number of different concepts and just to kind of grease the sleds, so I’m gonna review a few of them that have stuck out with me, because I’m taking notes here. I need some help and one of these is ‘magic do’ versus ‘magic goo.’

Shaye: I love that.

Dr. Paul: This is kind of silly, but I’m a silly guy, so ‘magic do’ versus ‘magic goo.’ Be willing to persist and continue and for me, that has to do with realizing you’re in the middle part of an inspiring story and keep that perspective. Have some confidence that you can and will change. Don’t let the giant intimidate you and we didn’t really talk about giants but I was, it’s kind of funny. About a week and a half ago, I took one of my sons out to the west desert in Utah and we were looking for bugs for his ninth grade biology bug collection. Okay, I was looking for some of those big old Mormon crickets, couldn’t find any, but we did find a tarantula and we gathered that thing up and we brought it back and I posted a picture on my email this last week and it’s almost the size of a dollar bill. Okay and that’s a huge, that’s a giant spider, right? Compared to what? Compared to other spiders. It’s really not a giant compared to me. I could squish it easily, but when you compare it to other spiders, it’s huge, right. So we looked at the Giants in our life and it’s always compared to what?

I’ve got here, also, work on purpose and I appreciated your comments about that just before the break, Leslie. Is it just work or is it work on purpose towards some particular end and that makes it a construction project and then count the cost. Like what you had to say about that, Shaye. Those are some of the take homes that I’m identifying. I want to give you guys some time to just kind of summarize what’s sticking out for you.

Shaye: Well, as you go through those notes that you’ve written, I can’t help but think that somebody listening to this is gonna feel like, yeah I’ve heard all that.

Dr. Paul: mm-hmm

Shaye: Be persistent. Is that new? How original, guys, thanks. Work on purpose. These things, you know, we’re looking for some new kind of information. We’re looking for something that really isn’t there and if I could write the best book in the world, unfortunately I don’t think it would be a best-seller, but maybe I could get some coaching from Leslie on that, but if I wrote the best book in the world, I believe it would go like this. It would have a nice cover, maybe a flower or some cool picture on it. You would open it up. There’d be one page and in the middle of that page, it would say, “Have faith.” You turn the page over and it would say, “The end” and then it would say, “It’s up to you.” That’s probably too many words.

Well, that means something to you at different points. When you hear these things, sometimes it’s like, okay I’ve heard that, I’ve heard that, I’ve heard that, I’ve heard that, but depending on where you’re at, you’re gonna hear it differently and someone might say to you, be persistent or count the cost and also you’re going to see the value of it. You’re gonna have a relationship with the value of what this means, so one of the greatest things that I can say, kind of setting up for a conclusion, is it’s important that you go through whatever filters you have in front of you. Continue to go through those filters, because this information is true, whether it works in your brain right now or not, it is true and in your heart you know it is.

This is what we’re talking about. You know what is right, you know this information. Why aren’t you doing stuff about it? Continue to go through that, because these filters will remove themselves. They’ll come off piece by piece. You might have a hundred to get through. You might have two to get through, but the point is, when you get through that, all of a sudden you’re gonna see it and it’s not one of these things, ah, I get it now. When someone comes up to me and they say, “Oh, I get it.” My response usually back is, “Uh, actually you don’t.” I go, “What do you get?” “I get how to be successful.” “Uh, no you don’t.” “Are you being successful right now?” “No, but I’m going to.” “Okay, you don’t get it.” It’s not a pursuit of getting it. You don’t need to get it. What you need to do is continue and when you do get it, when your life is the way you enjoy it, you’re enjoying day by day. Now you can say you get it. That’s great, but you don’t need to have this preamble, this early victory, saying, “Oh I get it all now. I finally got the pieces together and now I can go do it.”

Why do you cut yourself short? It’s almost as though we want to say, “Look, I’m really not interested in life. I just like to be a billionaire and have everything I want. I’d like to skip the whole life part of this, get to the thing.” Well you know, good luck with that one. Have fun there, but I believe that if you really want to enjoy and have happiness, no matter what’s going on, I always laugh at people that, I shouldn’t say I laugh at them, I find it amusing that they buy into the story that circumstances predict their emotions, right, because the truth is, you do have power over those things and so the greatest take-home I can give is, continue. Continue to read, continue to study, continue to ponder, continue getting through those filters, because you’ll get there. You really will, if you’re persistent and you’ll be able to see everything, but if it’s on purpose and you’re going in the same direction, you’ll get where you’re going. Be careful where you’re going.

Leslie: Yeah, I’d have to echo that. That, you know, you’re talking about what would be the take home and essentially mine would be the same message maybe from a different angle and I just go back to the combination lock with all the tumblers in it. There might be a hundred tumblers that have to fall into place, but once you get a nugget, once you have an epiphany or something, that maybe you heard something on this program that answered a question specific to your situation right now, just a little nugget that helps you continue, that helps you have the courage and the stamina to just take one more step and you can know that just because it didn’t all solve everything today, that tumbler is in place. You’re ready for the next one to fall into place and it is a step by step and I don’t even know who said it. I think it was Napoleon Hill that said that you will meet with success in uncommon hours. How does that go? I can’t remember, but it’s one day you’re going to be at a place where you’ll look back and you’ll see that all of those pieces had to fall into place, in that order, for you and here you are and you’ll discover that you’re happy anyway, without the success that you were striving so vehemently for and yet once you’re happy where you are, that’s when the success really starts to fall into place for you and you’ll realize, well you could have been happy with or without it and look what a gift. Here it is.

Dr. Paul: I think we’re deceived often, to think that our life is to pursue this illusive happiness wherever it is, that I’m all about trying to find that happiness and we don’t understand that life is happiness, that when you make that choice, it’s like what you were saying, Shaye, that the circumstances just don’t matter that much and the most inspiring stories I know have that as a central theme. Look at all of this stuff and despite all of this stuff, I found happiness. I found peace. I found joy and if you could experience that, what else matters and the money and the stuff and the success, you know, all of that can be part of the picture, but don’t be deceived that, that is the end goal. If you can choose happiness, that defines success. In my mind, that is the definition of success. You’re gonna choose happiness and you realize that you have the power to choose that.

Leslie: And the truth is, you have all that you need right here in this moment. You really do. It’s just when we get thinking about what we don’t have for next week, that we think we need, we’re already projecting ourselves into a place of lack. Where, in reality, today, in this moment, I’ve had food. I’ve had a roof over my head. I have air to breathe. I have relationships. We have all that we need right now to be happy in this moment. That’s where it begins.

Dr. Paul: Yeah, that’s right. I think those are some pretty good take homes. I hope that all of you, who are listening, find your own take home. Whatever it is that’s ringing with you is the most important thing that we have said or introduced and even if we didn’t say it, if you thought it and if you are inspired to have some kind of an insight, that’s the most important thing for you. Run with that and persist, continue. Now, I don’t have the power to make any of you succeed, but if I can help you to think of the things and to get yourself to do the things that will bring that success into your life, that’s what I want to do.

Dr. Paul: Leslie, thank you for joining us.

Leslie: Been great.

Dr. Paul: Shaye, thank you so much.

Shaye: Thank you very much.

Dr. Paul: We’ll look forward to seeing you guys later on. Go out there and live on purpose.

[Music]

This concludes today’s episode of The Rare Faith podcast. You’ve been listening to Leslie Householder, author of the Jackrabbit Factor, Portal to Genius and Hidden Treasures, Heavens Astonishing Help With Your Money Matters. All three books can be downloaded free at ararekindoffaith.com, so tell your friends and join Leslie again next time as she goes even deeper into the principles that will help you change your life.

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Is Victory Really Possible?

When challenges come, it’s easy to doubt whether there really is success to be had on the other side. The wall seems too high, the bricks too large, you feel too small to go over it, and too weak to break through it. A continual barrage of setbacks can cause you to question even the possibility of victory.

At a time when I was beginning to wonder if some of MY dreams were like the proverbial carrot, dangling in front of my face and never getting any closer, some of them felt like they were already years overdue. I tried to keep moving my feet in that direction, but I was really beginning to wonder. I don’t think I had ever been stretched that far…

But gratefully, God finally let it materialize. I felt sobered and grateful, and I didn’t take it for granted.

If you’re questioning the possibility of victory, know that the success is already there awaiting your arrival, and keep moving in that direction until you reach it. There is no “IF;” there’s only “WHEN.” I know that’s true on a deeper level than before. I’m a different and better person for having my own perseverance so severely tested.

I knew the challenges were good, because I had long since learned that with the laws of success, the challenges are actually part of the recipe for the very cake I ordered. But I had begun to wonder if the challenges would ever give way to the victory. Gratefully, I was reminded (again) that they eventually do.

Every time I have set a goal of significant magnitude, I have been obliged to face a challenge or two (or three, or a HUNDRED) that needed to be overcome before I would finally enjoy the victory I sought. But now I can say with certainty that our dreams are ours because they are possible, and are waiting for us at the end of our persistence test.

By the grace of God, it comes. But God does not give us the victory if WE stop preparing for it.

Each time, this goal setting process seems to stretch me to my limits, and beyond. Yes, each time. The more I go through the process, however, the more practice I have in enduring it. Every story of success I share with you has an untold struggle that went with it. No matter how many times I’ve succeeded, the process repeats itself to some degree.

Having an understanding of the process doesn’t take the process away, it simply makes it bearable and helps me to keep doing my part. It gives me peace of mind to realize and be consciously aware that the darkness, uncertainty, and turmoil in the middle is simply the gift, the opportunity to prove myself. It’s where I can exercise my faith like a muscle, demonstrate my drive to press on (though it may feel like I’m crawling to the finish line, bleeding and delirious), and hold fast to my expectancy of the WIN on the other side. Knowing how the Law works, I begin to feel differently about the struggle, and seeing it for what it is, I’m able to be more grateful for it, and thus the sooner I’m able to receive.

The Miracle’s Promise

My son has been putting himself through college with a determination to pay as he goes. Each semester has had its own set of challenges, and each time he has discovered different and unexpected solutions that helped him through. Two weeks before the end of his most recent semester, he called and said, “I’m done. I can’t do this anymore. I’m just DONE.”

So I gave him a pep talk, encouraging him to find the strength to give it just two more weeks and finish strong, imagining how good it will feel to look back on it with relief and amazement at what he had accomplished. He had already long since let go of the hope that he would get straight A’s, which would have been his ticket to tuition waivers for future semesters. He was resigned to getting B’s in half of his classes, but even still, he couldn’t seem to muster the energy to go even another day.

We brainstormed on a few next steps that he could take to get himself out of the funk. I reminded him to speak strength. Instead of affirming that he can’t keep going, I wasn’t going to hang up the phone until I heard him say, “I can do this” and then projecting our minds forward, I also wanted to hear him say, “I DID IT.”

I also encouraged him to talk to one of his professors and explain the reason he missed the mandatory attendance day. He had skipped class that day to drive 4 hours and pick his sister up at the SLC airport to deliver her to the MTC – the last time he would see her for 18-months. We decided it couldn’t hurt; maybe the professor would show some mercy and adjust his score.

As he spoke strength, he immediately gained strength. We finished our call and he was back to the books.

Two weeks later, he called to say, “Well, it’s all done. It’s over. Every single class is behind me now, and I’m on my way home (a 16 hour drive).” He related how he felt about each of his finals, and though he knows his performance wasn’t totally stellar, he was at peace, knowing he had given it his all. He had done better than expected in a few of them, but it was yet to be seen how his final projects would be graded.

Twenty MINUTES later, he walked through my door! That kid totally punked me! He and his brother had actually finished the day before, and had driven through the night to surprise me. I was SO thankful I didn’t know they were on the wintery roads and driving through the night; it spared me 16 hours of worry. 🙂

Soon after, he logged into the system to check his grades. Somehow, he ended up with straight A’s after all. He kind of just stared at it numbly with a faint grin on his face. It was the only reaction he had energy for, after such a grueling 4 months.

Later he came to me and thoughtfully reflected:

“Mom, I don’t think miracles have ever made my life easier; they just made things possible.”

I have pondered that many time since. And it’s true. Maybe you didn’t know this is how the Law works.

Your job is to set the goal, see it done, feel the victory ahead of time, take action when opportunities and/or ideas come along (no matter how frightening they may be), and finally, do not neglect the final ingredient to the recipe:

Perseverance.

Because your greatest victories will always follow the most intense struggles.

“Then, what is are the laws for if I still have to endure challenges?”

They simply guarantee you will be provided with everything you need to accomplish the goal, and that it will all show up just when you need it, at the right and perfect time, and sometimes only after appearances indicate the opposite, and after you choose to be at peace, anyway. It promises that if you can conceive it, you can achieve it.

It’s amazing if you think about it. Isn’t it better than no guarantee at all?

So now, think about that goal you want to achieve, and know this:

It’s possible, and that’s a miracle. So keep at it until you achieve it.  Originally published Mar 29, 2008

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LBW 07: Law of Rhythm-The Waves of Life

When facing difficulties, you don’t have to think of them as setbacks; instead, think of them like labor waves. You are giving birth to a dream, and each surge of pain indicates progress, not failure. There will be hard times, and good times. Difficulties sometimes come in waves, but they always pass. It’s the rhythm of life. Listen to this audio to understand why it’s ALL good.

Background music: Brandenburg Concerto No4-1 BWV1049 – Classical Whimsical by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution license (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/)
Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100303
Artist: http://incompetech.com/

TRANSCRIPT:

LESLIE: I believe the universe operates in a lawful manner. I believe that it’s God’s laws that the universe operates by and so when I teach you to set a goal and we use laws of the universe to help these goals come to pass more smoothly and a little more easily, it is in no way to discount that I believe God is the source of all blessings and that the universe operates by His laws. And so if it’s the universe that delivers the goods to me there is no argument there between the theologian and the scientist. I think that we live in a scientific world and I believe that God’s the author of all of it. So whatever your vocabulary is on the matter just translate where you need to be in order to feel comfortable with the way I talk about these things. But I think we all have beliefs that we can build on together.

So life does have ups and downs. It’s just part of life. If we didn’t have a down, we wouldn’t know what an up really felt like. We wouldn’t even know we were having an up if we hadn’t had a down. And that’s good. Even when we’re really focused and determined we will have what feel like ups and downs. That’s the law of rhythm. It’s one of those universal laws. There are seasons. There is the tide that comes in and out. The day: it’s night, it’s day. These kinds of cycles are natural and there are cycles in our own life that we will discover and we can experience whether or not we understand what’s going on. If we’re having a down we can expect another up by the law of rhythm. We’re not going to be down forever and as you start looking forward to the up, it puts you in a different state of mind to start noticing the little evidences that up is coming. And by noticing them you’ll start to take action on them and the up will come even faster.

We need to be positive minded and we need to be hopeful and when we have a hiccup and we’re feeling down, you know, experience it completely, feel it, do what you got to do but expect that the upturn is on its way. Expect that you won’t be miserable forever. Expect it. Expect it. Watch for the evidence because it’ll come. The discomfort that we feel in life comes in surges. It doesn’t come all at once and it doesn’t come eternally all bad. Truly, I know it may feel like that sometimes but you need to look at and appreciate those little breathers that life gives us so that we can come up for air before we have to go under again. We’re given breaks along the way. We have relatively better days in between and on the other side of the tougher days.

It’s like going through labor to bring a child into the world. The labor pains come in surges. The mother is given breaks to have a chance to gather her strength. Now does there need to be a struggle at all? You know I’m told that some women have learned the art of labor without pain or medication but I would guess their mental toughness was something that had to be developed and I don’t know how it could have been developed without opportunity to practice during some pain. The baby will come with or without the pain. Experienced midwife’s however will tell you that the more you fight the pain the worse it’ll hurt. The same thing goes with trying to give birth to a dream. Whatever your goals are for your family, whatever those dreams you have for your individual life, whatever it is you’re aspiring to achieve or experience or accomplish, there will be work to be done regardless. It hurts less when you don’t fight it just like in giving birth.

Progress happens better when you relax in spite of hardships and apparent setbacks which are really only setbacks as much as labor pains are considered setbacks. Think about it. A labor pain, is that a setback? In reality each one brings you closer to the goal if you could really see it for what it was. Oh, if you could just see what I see. You know you set a goal and you start feeling the labor pains. It’s so easy to interpret those pains, interpret those setbacks as setbacks, as something that’s keeping you from accomplishing your goal when in reality it is the experience that you need to go through to mould you, to shape you into the person that can appreciate and that is going to be able to receive the goal, the blessing that you set out to accomplish in the first place. It’s the truth.

Like I said, the baby will come with or without the pain and it hurts less when you don’t fight it. How do I deal with this? One thing is for sure is that the joy at the end always far surpasses whatever is required along the way. Keep your eye on the prize and remember that nobody was ever pregnant forever. I’ve used this comparison of giving birth to a child to giving birth to a dream and this analogy helps me comprehend how we could possibly know whether we’re close to finally achieving a goal or reaching our dream. If you want to know if you’re close, you know sometimes it feels like you’re never gonna get there, but think about the first struggles you faced after setting a big goal. At first the discomfort, as in labor, is just bad enough to get your attention but certainly tolerable. Near the end however the pains are, for many, as if you’re at the door of death itself. During that final transition the surges come so quickly and then last so long that it would seem there is no relief in the middle. You know, I can say this from experience. I’ve had seven children. And I know that it just gets to where they’re on top of each other and you feel like, where is the relief? I want out of this, you know. And I know that giving birth to a dream can feel the same way. Where is the relief? When is the breakthrough? How much longer do I have to experience these setbacks? Well, when those pains come in that way, fast and furious, back to back, it’s natures way of saying that it’s almost over. Each pain is associated with progress, though it often cannot be measured and sometimes appears fruitless. But it is, it’s almost over.

You know what though, you can stop this dream from coming to fruition if you see these pains and abort. Don’t abort. Don’t abort. It’s not over, and it’s closer than you think. So if you have a dream and things are looking really really bad, and you’re getting hit by one challenge after another, with scarcely room to catch your breath in the middle, you are posed for the most glorious success you can imagine if you just keep putting one foot in front of the other. Sometimes, the relief only shows up at the moment you have come to the absolute end of all you can do. So you simply cannot allow yourself to give up any sooner. Sometime it comes when you’ve cut off all possibility of retreat. A person whose has not experienced this level of commitment could never possibly feel the exhilaration of the victory that corresponds to it. There are no words to describe it. Although you may experience a degree of it vicariously through others who’ve had books or movies made about them like Rudy Ruettiger or Will Stoneman.

To wrap this up I love how this poet makes the point. He says, “When things go wrong as they sometimes will, when the road you’re trudging seems all uphill. When the funds are low and the debts are high and you want to smile but you have to sigh, when care is pressing you down a bit, rest if you must but don’t you quit. Life is queer with its twists and turns as every one of us sometimes learns and many a fellow turns about when he might have won had he stuck it out. Don’t give up though the pace seems slow, you may succeed with another blow. Often the goal is nearer than it seems to a faint and faltering man. Often the struggler has given up when he might have captured the victors cup and he learned too late when the night came down, how close he was to the golden crown. Success is failure turned inside out, the silver tint in the clouds of doubt. And you never can tell how close you are it might be near when it seems afar. So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit, it’s when things seem worse that you must not quit.”

So now it’s your turn. Be the hero in your family. Don’t give up on the dream and show it by taking yet another step forward. If you’ve set a goal and it’s looking impossible to accomplish don’t give up. You do not need to know how it will all work out. You just need to keep moving forward as though it will. Even if you don’t know how things are going to work out say next Tuesday, there’s something that you can do today, and that’s all you need to do is today’s job. Today’s work, today’s effort. Just do today. Do what you can do today make that phone call. Prepare for the success you expect to enjoy. If you intend to sell a widget have you got the widget in hand ready to sell? If you intend to make a business deal do you know what you’re bringing to the table and what you expect to receive in return? Is it vague? Or is it in writing? Do what you can do today to prepare for the success.

There will always be something that pops into your mind of something you can do. Stop ignoring it as insignificant as it may seem, it might say, “step outside”. That might be as insignificant as it gets or “turn the corner here”. You never know who you might run into. You might run into the very person who has the solution to what you need. Get up and do what the thought says to do. That’s called learning to recognize and follow your intuition and trusting it. Whether you want to call it your gut instinct, inspiration, intuition or the inner voice, it’s time to start paying attention to it, in trusting that it’s leading you to where you decided to go when you set the goal. If you’re not getting any nudges one way or another then it’s time to set a goal. No more vague wishing. I’m talking about something you absolutely intend to accomplish no matter how long it takes.

What is it in life that you are that committed to? What does it look like for your family to accomplish the lifestyle that you want for them? And whether that means fancy cars, I don’t care. That’s not what it ever has meant for me. For me it equates to family time and being mom and being able to cuddle with my kids when I want to cuddle with them and not having to answer to anybody else or punch a clock or any of those things. It’s freedom to build your family, to strengthen those relationships and to be there for them when they need you. So you can expect those nudgings to come once you’ve made the decision of what specifically you intend to accomplish. Remember it’s always goal first, way second.

[Music]

ANNOUNCER: This has been a little bit of wisdom with Leslie householder. Listen to her podcast and download her books free at ararekindoffaith.com

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